waiting room...

...it's a room where hopes are up.

i'm in the waiting room for a long time but it looks like i'm giving up.


i just what to SHOUT. shout til i drop. shout til everything inside me gets out...

until nothing's left.

when you know what to do...

...then why not do it?

why wait for me? why wait for the worst?

is it really needed that one must reach the worst scenario before he would do something about it..isn't it annoying that one keeps on complaining about the life that he's got though the key to his sufferings is just in his pocket!

it is tiring to help other people patch things up in their life while you cant fix your own..and you see them that they did not even put a single effort..frustrating.

i just dont know what to do with this crap..

...bakit ba naman kasi lagi akong napapasok sa ganitong sitwayon?

Lord, am i too good that i have to carry some of other people's burden? haiiii......

it ends here.

i guess my "summer fun" ends here..my supposedly last summer trip to batangas with the team building class today was canceled for the weather forbids.. and tada! a trip wasted leaving excited students bored and hanging.

my summer ends here to be followed by a two or three bummer and dvd marathon weeks..or maybe a chance for me to save up for months of sleepless nights and stressful days coming up..

summer is officially over for me and it's the start of boredom and dull rainy days.. :(

..which results to a number of whatever lists...

must-haves and must-dos before classes starts..

• 10 or more hours of sleep everyday
• supeerrr clean my room again
• SHOPPING! SHOPPING! SHOPPING!
• a day with friends!! please...
  
• see iron man in the movie house
• visit a salon
• see a beach..though it's now rainy...
• a bonding with my team building class
• get a new battery for my laptop
• go out and drive out of town...
  
• to learn the guitar again..seriously this time..

on a more serious note..i often read and hear stories of people talking about their existence and them making the best out of their existence..so out of the blue..i just asked myself..why is it that it seems that i don't really know what to do with myself, why is it that i cant see my self in the future...

why do i exist?

• to TRAVEL
• feel
• be strong for other people's weakness
  
• save humankind from its extinction--reproduce! hahaha...
• be an angel to someone
• create friendships
• love
• add to my parents' burden
• serve the real purpose why i exist..sad but still i don't know what it is....

and now, what do i want?

• visit all the places on earth
• get a high paying job or a rich-high-earning husband (hahaha)
• have my own restaurant and be the master chef
• learn photography
• backpacking
• publish a book before i die
• be with someone
• play touch rugby again, learn tennis, gymnastics, pilates, wake boarding and surfing
• be called an athlete
• fly a kite
• become a drifter
• make my parents proud and get them up the stage to hand me my medal
• receive an extra-ordinary wedding proposal (but not necessarily get married..hahaha)
• dance in the rain with someone
• stargaze

too much for the list...this is the result of a saturday afternoon boredom inside the house.....tsk tsk..

akala nyo nagbibiro ako ah..

hahahaha!!! everybody thought that i was joking nung cnabi kong "ill bring the car today" kaya cneryoso ko talaga..dinala ko nga ung car...then when im finally in UP...i texted my mom and let her know na dala ko nga ung car...tawagan b naman daw ako sa cell phone and panic! haha..

well, nagddrive naman na talaga ako ever since i turned 18..pero i always make sure that someone who knows to drive is with me..mejo mabigat kc ung car ni dad kaya im afraid na bka mabangga ko un..kaya cguro hindi ako cneryoso ni mama and ng mga kapatid ko nung cnabi kong "ill bring the car today"..hahaha..

achievement toh..mejo na at ease na din ako to drive alone..hehe :)

naki ride pa ung team building classmates ko...my first ever passengers... yey!! :)

potpot

i was with my tito brian for the whole day today...and he let me know na naka schedule na yung wedding nila ng kanyang girlfriend for 10 years (lupet!) and picked me up sa haus to go to the designer for the gowns... honestly, i am happy but i am really sad.. xempre happy ako kasi he'll get married and finally he have enough sense of responsibility to start a family...pero nasad talaga ako kc tito brian was like my dad, big brother and friend.. super over protective din nya..and i grew up with him, ever since baby ako kasama ko na yan...tapos ngayon he's really getting married..

he's the only one now calling me "potpot" (my nickname nung bata ako) tapos knina sa car.. nung tinawag nya akong potpot sbi nya "ay dalaga ka na pla..pero ikaw a rin c potpot ko"

waah..i'm really gonna miss him when he's married na..wala nang mang-aagaw ng fone ko to check my messages...wala nang magchecheck ng bag ko to look for whatever evidence or signs of boyfriend...wla nang mang-aasar sakin ng "sungit"...pero ako pa rin ang potpot nya..

actually, hindi naman talga xa mawawala eh..pero xempre a lot of things will not be the same as before..pero ano nga ba naman magagawa ko diba but to be thankful coz he chose to have a better future...

potpot's wishing him the best in everything.. :)

pasalubong

..para akong bata na binigyan ng tatay ko ng lobo kanina..


i really didnt expect to see him today..i even thought of not really going to school..but i did. some things have never changed...he still has that funny makulit character..and he never fails to make me laugh so hard...but some things have..his hair, it's nicer.plus he told me that he got me a pasalubong from bora (but forget to bring it..useless!) eh kuripot un.. :))


...thank you for the effort and the time to see me...

;p