still

just today.. i cant look at him directly..

i ate my breakfast quietly but he still tried to share what happened to him yesterday..

i left for school quietly but he still bid bye bye..

i dont want to go home early but still he waited..

i kept quiet and pretend but still he kissed me and left...

he left again..but still i didnt grab the chance to say something..

"take care..we'll miss you"

im still weak at goodbyes.. i hate it..

different

we went to see manila ocean adventure park today..and even though i am so tired..i didnt take any minute thinking if i have to get up from bed or not..haha..the place was great..though it was not what i expected or maybe i expected more.. but i can say that it as an enjoyable experience... :)

this picture was taken inside the souvenir shop in the ocean park..it was used for the 3d picture package that the shop was offering for 400php.. there was something different with the picture..i just dont know why..i just felt something different.. we decided to get a soft copy from the photographer because the five of us wanted to have a copy of it in our own phones...hehe..

almost everything has changed..the way things run and the way we look at things inside this "family" and things will never be the same again..we tried but we always fail or sometimes when we push things harder it just gets worse..small things like this picture are is a big part of the change, i guess..i never experienced something like this when we all stayed under one roof.. and sometimes because of those changes, conflicts arise that just passes by and ends without closure.. everyone, i think, have recovered and have accepted the way things are though it was never easy, sometimes awkward and we have to be thankful even of small things like this "family portrait".. haha.

"family portrait"

--how ironic?! ;)

dark side?

elma asked me why do i maintain two blogs and had one secret from my friends..

at mejo na bother ako sa sinabi ko about me having a dark side?! feeling ko mali toh.. tpos nag react pa ung class...haha...

ako may dark side? cguro nga...

then i read some of my posts in that secret blog...tpos na realize ko na exaggerated nga ung term na nagamit ko..hindi naman dark side...it's more of my negative and sad side..mga bagay na hindi ko tlga msabi sa ilang tao..nrealize ko din na mxado nga tlga akong reserve...

got to change it i guess..

daddy got home today.

it's the first day of summer classes! and it was so hooottt!
socio 11 was okay and team building was fun! i got excited for the trips to come! yey! but im not sure who to hang out with for this pe...

daddy got home today! and we thought he will be here by saturday..

there's really nothing so important to rant about..

i just felt like sharing this.. and i was really happy to see that everything is fine..

mom and dad were okay..they were like friends hanging out and talking to each other..everyone was laughing to silly corny jokes.. and the night ended right.

i admit, i missed my dad! and i am happy that he's here for the summer! :)


a great day..i guess.

plan?

ma: ano plano mo?

ann: titigan tayo!

naman!! ako may plano?? kelan pa?
lagi naman wala..
for technically 18 years..
i never planned for anything..
the question is harder than an accounting problem!!
so do you expect me to give a sensible answer on that..
eh hindi nga nakalagay yun sa calendar ng fone ko eh!
haha..

it's just another day. :)

speechless

for days, i cant sleep well..

and i thought it was another sleepless night.. and i decided to go online at 12:27 am, sunday april 6..hoping that mom wont open my room to check on me..

xa: lord.Ü
zel: hmf!
xa: heheÜ
zel: ngulat ako!!!
zel: bt gcng k pa??
xa: wala lng, d ako inaantok ee

didnt expect that!...

and at past 1 am..i just decided to go to sleep and for the chit chat to end..

xa: ah..
zel: sleep n ko..
zel: :)
xa: nyek..
xa: ok.
zel: bkit nyek??
xa: missu..Ü nyt.ÜÜ
zel: miss u too.. :)
xa: nyt.Ü

and i signed out..

-speechless-

seethrough

there are just somethings that are better left unsaid..

may mga pagkakataon na hindi talaga natin kayang sabihin ang mga reasons why we ask for this and why we does that stupid thing..sometimes we dont need to explain the way we think and our decisions... may karapatan naman tayo na gawin yun eh..

transparency maybe is something we owe others specially the people important to us..

but does that mean that we always have to explain, to say everything, to let them know about problems and the situation??

there are really moments that we dont have to and we have keep things to our selves...and they should understand.

opaque. it is.

may be blured but lucky you that you got something to look at.